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    I once was a happy man
    Of sound and stable mind
    Then my neighbour got a dog
    He put a ribbon on its head
    To make it cute
    But it still looked like
    A chihuahua

    He had me over
    To watch it sit and beg
    It bit my knee
    And made love to my leg
    Now it barks all the night
    And all of the day
    Whenever it's not peeing on my lawn

    I didn't get to sleep last night
    Till very late
    The stupid dog barked
    And grred
    I woke up late
    And ran to catch the bus
    But i slipped on a turd

    I was certain
    It wasn't one of mine
    With that that dog
    Had crossed over the line
    I wanted to exterminate
    It and all its kind
    From my lovely little suburb

    I'm gonna kill the dog next door
    Ain't gonna bark anymore
    'cause this is judgment day
    The little runt has got to pay
    No more turds on my lawn
    That stupid mutt will soon be gone
    I'm gonna kill kill kill
    Kill kill kill kill that dog

    I see the little monster
    In my garden
    So i grab an axe and off i go
    And i try my best to get it
    All i do is sever my big toe
    My neighbour comes
    Outside to calm me
    He says his dog and me
    Should just be friends
    He puts his little pet
    In my forgiving hands

    Then it starts to bite
    So i strangle it with all my might
    Oh oh oh oh ohhhhh

    I'm gonna kill the dog next door
    Ain't gonna bark anymore
    'cause this is judgment day
    The little runt has got to pay
    No more turds on my lawn
    That stupid mutt will soon be gone
    I'm gonna kill kill kill
    Kill kill kill kill that dog

    Now the little mutt's
    In doggie heaven
    I strangled it to death
    And now i'm free
    But my trouble ain't
    Quite over
    My neighbour called
    The cops on me
    I end up at
    The police station
    Where i am told
    That i must pay
    A three hundred
    Dollar fine

    (*long pause*)

    Wow!!
    What a great value!
    I think i'll kill my neighbour too!
    Oh oh oh oh ohhhhh!

    I'm gonna kill the guy next door
    Won't call the cops anymore
    I never liked him anyway
    Three hundred isn't much to pay!
    There are turds on my lawn
    They must be his, his dog is gone
    I'm gonna kill kill kill kill kill kill kill
    Kill kill kill kill kill kill
    Kill kill kill kill kill that guy

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