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    The holidays are over, you've gained twenty pounds
    The cat's choking on tinsel, pine needles stalk the ground
    There are no cards in the mailbox, just a stack of bills
    Yes, the holidays are over and you are feeling ill

    Have a happy christmas hangover
    It's the most miserable time of the year
    The eggnog's made you fat, the party is over
    'cept for your wacky uncle who is still drinking your beer

    Turkey's great on christmas but after a whole month
    Of turkey pie and stew you start to dread lunch
    Breakfast is more frightening for all there is to eat
    Is fourteen christmas cakes and a bag of cranberries

    Have a happy christmas hangover
    It's the most miserable time of the year
    Your uncle's in the bathroom and granny's on the sofa
    And you start to wish that they'd just disappear

    You ate too many liquor-filled chocolates
    Got no money left in your pockets
    But at least you got lots of
    Ugly sweaters and bow ties and socks

    You're skin is pale and pasty, your energy is spent
    Along with all the money you need to pay the rent
    The children are all crying 'cuz they've broken all their toys
    Is this misery worth one day of joy?

    Have a happy christmas hangover
    It's the most miserable time of the year
    Your uncle has passed out on granny on the sofa
    And you start to wish that you could disappear

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